Today I Choose Tacos

I was scrolling through Facebook the other day when I see one of my friends showcasing their yoga handstand for all to see. Now, I’m not going to lie, I sort of instantly found myself Facebook crushing, hard. Like seriously, who at 30 years old can actually do a handstand without the crippling terror of their own body weight combined with, hello, gravity working against them and crushing their oh so fragile neck into smithereens. It is a constant fear that dangles precariously in the back of my mind at literally any given moment when the mention of handstands, cartwheels or even a damn somersault for that matter comes up in conversation.

So yes when I saw this video so nonchalantly placed on her wall, I was pretty impressed to say the least.

And it got me to thinking, hey, I should really try to tone up the ole bod. After all I will be entering back into the workforce soon and I’d like to be sort of in shape for those grueling eight hour work days. I have a feeling I’m not “work ready” right now. I say this as I eat tacos at the computer chair and it’s 9 o’clock in the morning. And as the good lord is my witness I will never give up those morning tacos so I’m going to have to start counter balancing them with something.

My problem with working out is that I actually hate it. It’s just so hard! I always start off strong. Every day for about a week I will exercise, but then once I remember my total and utter hatred for the task I end up quitting. This is a problem for two major reasons. One, it really isn’t helping me in my getting healthy goal and two, I am setting a horrendous example for my children. I can’t just let them see me quit every little thing that makes break down crying from exertion. I must teach them that exercise is healthy and a necessary *coughevilcough* for a hale and hearty existence.

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Um…Ya, okay.

Therefore I have decided that if I am going to exercise I should really look into the different programs and explore what would fit my lifestyle best.

I do really enjoy jogging, although with the state my body is in at the moment it is more like walking and hopping into a job when I feel nervous about a dubious character approaching me. (It was an old lady walking her dog. She looked pretty buff from afar in my defense.)

Walking/sometimes jogging is something I enjoy but I feel like at this point I’m going to need to up the ante a little.

I began looking online for some workout videos and came across a particular hybrid yoga fad that is pretty big right now. It involves dance and yoga and some other pretty cool things that I think I could totally get on board with. Upbeat yoga? Yes please.

Look out Facebook friend, I will be joining you in news feed handstands in no time! I think to myself as I saddle up for my very first online class.

Now, never in my life have I been coordinated, not even a little bit. I fall down almost every day, usually while walking over level ground. But that doesn’t matter, it’s all about having fun while you work out. This is the money ticket, I can already tell.

It begins. A tribal beat pumps methodically out from my computer speakers and I find myself unconsciously moving to the sounds. I am squatting and bouncing and I imagine if an outsider was looking in it would seem as though I was doing some pretty unholy things to my living room floor. I am feeling fantastic.

Pretty soon I am literally the sexiest woman who has ever lived and I am yoga-ing and dancing in ways I never knew possible.

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That is until I catch a glimpse of myself in the reflection of the television. I don’t want to say I look awful because that would be cruel and self-loathing but I will say I resemble that of an uninhibited sloth attempting some sort of grimaced and lonely mating ritual.

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In every instance in the past, this mere sight would have turned me off of my new exercise endeavour, however not today. Because today I choose health! Today I choose to teach my children about sticking with it! Today I choose to make a difference! And most importantly today and every day henceforth I choose tacos!

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