Naked In The Bathroom Mirror

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Naked In the Bathroom Mirror

Recently a girl said to me in a frenzy,

“Do not post those pics on Facebook

I’ve got a muffin top in them.”

I gave her one of these, “Pftt”

And proceeded to ask why she cared.

Now this did not fare well for me

As she looked me up and down, scowled and replied,

“As if you don’t care.”

And maybe once I would have.

Once I would have hated the naked body

That stared back at me from the bathroom mirror.

Maybe I would have resided right alongside this girl

Scrolling fanatically through I-phone photos

Choosing just the right angle so the Facebook and Instagram ogler couldn’t detect

Those double chocolate coco cookies I consumed only minutes before.

Maybe at one time when I gazed upon a picture of myself

All I would see was a double chin, cellulite skin, and a chipped toothed grin.

Maybe I once fixated on being thinner.

I could be trimmer, slimmer, and all around fitter.

Maybe I would fear there would always be a better…

Maybe back then

When I looked at this heinous version of myself

I would have obsessed on how to deliver

A prettier body in my bathroom mirror.

Maybe I stewed over how to wither away those last 30, 20, 10

God forsaken pounds

Because I somehow thought that misplacing that fat

Was the key to my everlasting happiness.

Maybe I needed filters and Photoshop

To perceive my self-worth.

Maybe that legendary number on that proverbial scale

Produced this gale force wind blowing in-

Insecurity and self-doubt.

Or maybe- I was just not supposed to love myself.

I don’t know when it changed

Or why or how or for what cause.

It didn’t seem like something to keep track of I guess.

What I do know is that when I stand

Naked in front of my bathroom mirror-

I fear nothing anymore.

I embrace the pot belly I once scathed

I can eat like a goddamn queen on any given day.

I no longer see the imperfections.

No, they are whitewashed by a chipped toothed grin

While I laugh freely and dance uninhibitedly.

I’ve trashed the scale that once made me feel so damn sickly.

And I will continue to preach loudly about beauty.

All that I know for certain I now am.

And all of that uncertainty beforehand

Now just seems so damn silly.

I feel lighter as the blinders have been removed

And I can unequivocally love

This naked body that stands before me

In my bathroom mirror.

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