Okay so I degenerated and surrendered myself to the evil spirit of the ‘Selfie’.
I got to say, I look good.
I don’t know why I haven’t done this earlier. Man it is awesome, just taking pic’s all by my lonesome.
Duck Face, Mirror slut, pretending to be happy aside from the depressing fact that I am in solitude and have no other person to actually take a photo of me…It’s awesome. I feel great right now.
I engaged in a considerable amount of research before doing my Selfie photo shoot.
And what I found was that it is all in the forethought of the picture taking in question…
1. The most important key in getting a great Selfie is to first and foremost get your drink on.
Let all those inhibitions of ‘others opinions’ and ‘looking like an idiot’ fly strait out the window.
Connect with your inner self.
Feel the Selfie…Be the Selfie.
2. Get that damn Duck face down pat!
If at first you don’t succeed- try, try again.
If I can stress one thing, it is this, you MUST master that pose.
3. Look remotely skinny in that Selfie? POST IT!
Shimmy that body until you can get that perfecto pose where you look at least 10 pounds thinner than what you are. Kudos my friend you achieved that look all by yourself. You are pure awesomeness.
4. GO CRAZY!
Show all those Facebookers that you are a wild woman! You know what you want and that is a good god damn pic of your greatness.
Way to be wonderful!
5. Photo bomb the most unsuspecting people.
The fifth hint in taking a satisfying Selfie is to photo bomb the hell out of people. Make sure the accompanying party has no idea of what you are doing…This way you will always be the star of your own Selfie.
And, the unsuspecting persons will be Facebook famous there afterwards! Yay for them!
6. Be as coy as you possibly can
“Oh did I just take and upload a Facebook Selfie? Ah silly me…”
7. Use props whenever possible
No explanation necessary…Am I right Selfie takers?
8. Caption, caption, caption
Finally in my quest to capture the perfect Selfie I have discovered that captioning the Selfie in question can do wonders for the picture…
“Vanity is the essence of vainness and vainness is the essence of egotism…
“Anyone wanna come cuddle? I’m so darn lonely I had to take a Selfie…”
“Anyone want to come over and trade blouses? I gots lots to spare!”
“Oooh I’m so drunk…Why am I taking Selfies right now?”
“Well no one seems to want to hang at the moment, so I guess I’ll just write a blog post about Selfies…”