Midnight Acrobatics

As per Miss Sophie’s post yesterday, we have been having some sleeping issues in the Brown household as of late. For the last few weeks almost like clockwork, the girl has been waking in the middle of the night crying and distraught from scary dreams and imaginary monsters she is conjuring up from behind the shadows in her room.

So every night I will stumble groggily into her sleeping space, and try to comfort her. Sometimes, a simple flick of her bedside lamp will suffice but sometimes, that just doesn’t do the trick. Sometimes, I have to crawl into bed with her and hunker down amongst her and her hundreds of stuffy’s and prepare to stay there until she is deep into her sleep cycle.

Last night was one of these nights.

I wake up disoriented. At first I thought I was in my own room but quickly realized I was not when I got a swift Sophie elbow to the face, this quickly reminded me that I had crawled in with her hours before. I am pushed up against the wall and using a large stuffed pony as a pillow. This sucks.

Time to make my way back to my bed.

I slowly sit up, the dim light from outside gleans in the window and I see my sweet girl sleeping snoring soundly.

I reach my leg over her to get out of the entrapment I am currently in. As soon as my body shifts into such a position the kid wakes up. She immediately starts screaming bloody murder, telling me I CANNOT LEAVE HER.

Great I’m stuck.

So I go back to sleep, beside her. Currently in my sleep deprived state I cannot think of another solution to the problem.

I only drift off before I am awoke once again, this time from the child rolling directly on top of me. I am currently being smothered by a 2 year old body and claustrophobia begins to set in.

OK, I have to get the hell out of here. My back is killing me from the cramped quarters and the silhouette of my own bed from across the hall is looking mighty awful inviting at this time.

This is going to take some fancy ninja like moves, but I’m getting out of this bed without the girl waking up if it kills me. (Because continuing to sleep like this surely will)

I lift my legs directly up- perpendicular style- hold for ten seconds to ensure this movement has not woke up the Soph. Success! I then slowly…Oh so slowly, begin to lower the legs while simultaneously sitting my body upright.

I am now positioned sitting erect beside the wall, the child still sleeps. A touch of panic arises when I question myself on how I will get to the floor from this location without moving so much that I will wake the kid up.

The thought of flipping right over her crosses my mind, along with the vision of me doing some awesome kind of contortionist move…But then I come to the unfortunate conclusion that I am in no way that flexible or even remotely that talented.

So instead I hug close to the wall and indulge in this strange worm like movement- scrunching my legs back and forth whilst inching towards the bottom of the bed.

My feet finally reach to carpet and I am ecstatic, almost as if I have conquered some kind of phenomenal conquest, that of which has been implausible until this point in time.

I’ve done it, and I am feeling extraordinary.

 I take one last look at my darling daughter as I vacate the room. It wasn’t until I tripped over the play kitchen that I saw it, and oh the clatter it made!

It only took a mere second to find myself back in the confined single bed trying to sooth my overzealous babe.  

And as I drifted off to dreamland while rubbing the distraught child’s back, I dreamt of a day when I would not have to yearn for the skills of an acrobat to flee the reformatory of my daughters bed.  

One day, Lindsay…One day.

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