Down on the freeway of Cowboy Trail

Out of his Chevy he had to hop,

For the deep down rumble just would not stop.

He foresaw the beginnings of an epic fail

Down on the freeway of Cowboy Trail.

 

I was awoken just this morning, with a call from my bro

Reliving quite the story; he said it was an all-time low.

If you choose to read the lines that I write here today

Keep in mind, this ‘aint a story of mere child’s play;

 

He was driving down the highway, singin’ some tunes,

Texting with his girl….they’re lovebird loons.

On his way to work, justa mindin’ his own

when  his stomach started doing a far-out groan.

 

The road he was traveling was busy and vast

His options were slim, and he had to think fast!

So he found a little nook, on the highways shoulder

And clambered on out, his stomach a boulder

 

Out of his Chevy he had to hop,

For the deep down rumble just would not stop.

He foresaw the beginnings of an epic fail

Down on the freeway of Cowboy Trail.

 

He tried to hide away from on-passers eyes

“They can’t see me here” were his candid lies

About to squat by the wheel of  Ol’ Red

When he realized that the ‘movement’ had already fled.

 

A 23 year old man, and an awkward dance

On the side of the route, with his shit filled pants

There he was squatting  on the face of the road

unsure of how to get rid of the rest of his load

 

He Peeled off his pants and his marble streaked britches

trying to avoid his reeking riches

“How did this happen?” he asked in a rant

“There’s no way I can show up like this to the plant!”

 

Out of his Chevy he had to hop,

For the deep down rumble just would not stop.

He foresaw the beginnings of an epic fail

Down on the freeway of Cowboy Trail.

 

With nothing between, the seat and his ass

he speed dialed his boss, faster than fast

“I’ll be a little late this Saturday Morn,

This drive provided, some problems be borne.”

 

There were no questions asked, at least there weren’t yet

Which cause the man a little less fret

It was over an hour to get back to his home

Where he’d wash out his Carhartts, and what had splashed back at his chrome.

 

He walked into his house, where his girlfriend stood loyal

And she washed out his socks that were spoiled with soil

‘What a good woman I got’ He thought with such splendour

‘I wonder if I could get her to scrub off my fender?’

 

Out of his Chevy he had to hop,

For the deep down rumble just would not stop.

He foresaw the beginnings of an epic fail

Down on the freeway of Cowboy Trail.

 

Finally, he was back on the road

With pants that were clean, and free of his load

That’s when he thought to call his sister and to tell her the tale

Of his unfortunate morning, out on Cowboy Trail.

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