We all have those friendships that will last the duration of existence. Through vicious fights, family hardships and sometimes just when we need a shoulder to cry on. My thoughts are, these lasting friendships are what keeps us as mothers sane. At the time, when I found out I would be having a child, I began to grow a bit of a chip on the ol’ shoulder. My attitude was; ‘if you don’t have a child, you have no clue what I am going through.’ Well this may be true to an extent but especially throughout this last summer I have come to realize how significant and valuable my friends have been to me through the exciting and horrifying journey of parenthood.
We had drifted apart in the last few years, whether it was work related, family, or just life in general we had lost touch. There was only the occasional phone call to keep us linked together. But then one day, my friend of 19 years, Ashley showed up on my doorstep and life took a very interesting turn. Ashley is the kind of person, who has a very unique way of making an individual feel just plain happy. I welcomed her into my home with open arms, and told her she could stay as long as she needed. She had just moved from B.C. in hopes of finding a new and prosperous career. With her, she not only brought a new Auntie for my children, but rekindled the friendship that had been slowly slipping away.
The kids loved her from the moment they saw her, if I am sure of one thing, I am sure of that. Ashley will always be known to them as ‘Crazy Auntie Ash-uh-lee.’ She had only been moved in for about a week and the kids and I were having a movie night. Air mattress sprawled out on the floor and us snuggled up watching ‘Finding Nemo’. Ashley came in the house looking weary. “A little hung-over, are we Auntie?” I asked in a mocking tone. “Oh god yes!” She replied with absolutely no qualms about it. We engaged in a little small talk, as she was showing me her brand new I-phone that she was indubitably proud of. Sophie meandered towards her long lost Auntie wanting a cuddle, in which Ashley greeted generously. “Oh hello my Soph-…” That’s when Ashley got an up close and personal look at life with children. As she picked up her niece, Sophie (which now when I look back upon it, was looking a little pale) looked at Ashley, looked at the I-phone, back to Ashley and heaved rotten curdled milk all over the phone, her lap and perfectly manicured hair. The smell was pungent, I was speechless and Ashley’s face was stunned. I could already tell that this incidents scent was going to linger. There was only a split second of this horrified silence before Ash leapt into action, “I’m sorry Soph, I love you….BUT I HAVE TO CLEAN OFF MY PHONE!!!” Quickly but gently Ashley held Sophie under the armpits, extended her reach as far as she possibly could and scurried across the room to where she placed the child in my lap. Then darted to the kitchen to try and salvage her brand new puke filled phone. The phone recovered immaculately.
My long time friend Janelle was thrilled when she found out I was pregnant with my first child Lars. As many pregnancies these days, Lars was a surprise and my husband and I had only been dating for a few months. I had big plans to travel east, which Janelle wasn’t all that thrilled about as I had been living on the west coast for the last year and had just recently made the move home. So when little fetus Lars came about, Janelle was in 7th heaven knowing I would be secured tight at home for an undetermined timeframe.
When Lars was about one, Janelle was over visiting and we were going to give him a bath. Lars, being an early walker was toddling around aimlessly while I ran the water. He perched himself in the doorway of the bathroom as Janelle and I tested the tubs temperature to make sure it was sufficient for the babe. That’s when I saw something in the corner of my eye on the ceiling of the room. I pointed towards it. Big mistake. Now for some reason, to this day I still am not sure why, Janelle thought I was looking at a spider on the roof, despite it being the middle of winter. What you must realize about my best friend is that I have never met another individual with such an unfounded fear of spiders. She will break down in tears if one is getting too close or surprises her. So as soon as her mind began to create this vision of an odious spider crawling down towards her, she injected into exploit and survival mode kicked in. Her head shot up to where I was pointing, a gasp escaped her mouth that somewhat resembled the sound of a squealing kettle, she looked towards her escape route where one year old Lars wobbly stood, Janelle made a run for it. Propelling Lars out of her way was her only option at the time, I don’t hold it against her, that imaginary spider was terrifying, and she had to get the hell out of there.
It was my daughters 9 month in 9 month out party. I was still nursing her at the time but could not manage to pry her away from friends and family, so I opted to pump and let one of the granny’s bottle feed her. Pumping though was such boring business I asked my friend Val to come hang out with me while I did so. Any mother who nurses will know that from the first time you stick that baby on your boob, you will never think of your breast in the same way. And after this day, I believe Val had the same thoughts. I got myself all rigged up. Connected. Meanwhile Valerie and I were making small talk about everything, it’s amazing what women can gossip about while one of their boobs is hanging out. This all stopped though once the electric pump commenced. In mid sentence Val stopped, looked directed at the contraption strapped to my chest, cringed and turned a very ashen hue. “Oh my god! Doesn’t that hurt!” The words escaped her lips as though they had a mind of their own, before she let me answer, her face was only a few inches away from the act and was talking in an unusually high pitched voice, “Your nipple! It’s like extending soooo far into that thing! Jesus Murphy…” she moved into a whisper, “…will it get ripped off?”
“No! It doesn’t even hurt, boobs are pretty tough things once you get used to a baby eating from on them all day.” I replied with a laugh to my stricken friend. With that, Valerie continued to view the awkward breast progress and said in a lark, “Is it weird that I kind of want to try it?!”
The friends that mean the most, will always be there to give you a laugh. It doesn’t matter how long it has been or what differences there are in your lives. Thank you Ladies for helping me keep my good sense by always giving me a few things to giggle about.